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Summary of Transcript:
The video features an interview with author and physician Gabor Mate, who talks about the myth of normality in society. He argues that what is considered normal in our culture is not healthy or natural, and instead, is making us sick. Many illnesses are actually adaptive responses to abnormal circumstances, such as childhood trauma, which makes it hard for people to maintain their authenticity while also attaching to others. Mate uses the example of rheumatoid arthritis to show how the illness is a result of an adaptive response of people who try to fit in with others and suppress their emotions. Finally, he argues that humans evolved with an expectation for attachment and unconditional acceptance, and those who do not receive it may develop illnesses.
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Summary of Description:
Dr. Gabor Mate, a trauma and addiction expert, discusses his latest book, “The Myth of Normal,” which explores how trauma and toxic culture affect illness and healing. He exposes the idea that our society’s new norm of normalized lack of health is actually making us sick. Mate discusses how childhood trauma and suppressed anger lead to autoimmune diseases and how our adaptive responses to bad parenting decisions cause problems in our adult lives. Mate suggests that we need to be in touch with our emotions and true to ourselves, and relationships that support these values are crucial. Mate also emphasizes the importance of healthy anger as a boundary defense, and how trauma imprints make us react to the present like we’re still children, even if it’s unwilled or automatic. He ends by asking why we should settle for the worst versions of ourselves and proposes that we change our unhealthy culture.
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Have you ever stopped to question the normalcy of our society’s lack of health? It seems that we’ve become so accustomed to living with illnesses, both physical and mental, that we no longer question their prevalence. In fact, we’ve come to accept illness as the new norm. But at what cost?
Renowned trauma and addiction expert, Dr. Gabor Mate, sheds light on this issue in his latest book, The Myth of Normal, Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture. In a recent episode of Impact Theory en Español, Dr. Mate delves into the myth of normality and how it’s making us sick. He explains how childhood trauma and suppressed anger can lead to autoimmune diseases and how our adaptive responses to bad parenting decisions cause problems in our adult lives.
Dr. Mate discusses the need for authenticity and attachment, and how setting boundaries through love and example can create conditions of unconditional love. He stresses the importance of being in touch with our emotions and gut feelings, and how suppressing them can actually suppress our immune system.
But it’s not just our individual experiences that play a role in our health – societal and cultural factors come into play as well. Dr. Mate explains how our society’s definition of wealth as a set of social connections rather than physical possessions has a profound effect on our health. He also highlights the fact that in our society, it’s often the worst versions of ourselves that are nourished while the best versions are suppressed.
Ultimately, Dr. Mate urges us to question the norm and not settle for the worst versions of ourselves. We must draw boundaries and create conditions of unconditional love in our relationships, and work towards changing a culture that is causing us harm.
If you’re interested in learning more about Dr. Mate’s insights, check out his latest book, The Myth of Normal, or follow him on his various social media platforms. As Dr. Mate suggests, it’s time to shift the way we see everything and take control of our own health and wellbeing.
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Source Description
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On Today’s Episode:
Either you or someone you know is dealing with illness on some level. Whether it’s an autoimmune condition, metabolic disorder, or mental health crisis, it’s hard to escape the reality of how sick our society has become and so we’ve normalized our lack of health and made it the new norm without really questioning why.
In our fast-paced technological world where medical breakthroughs are more common it feels like we’re further from a solution than when we started or we’re just solving for problems we’ve been creating and consequently we’re farther from optimal health than ever before. At what cost is all this happening?
Dr. Gabor Mate is a world renowned trauma and addiction expert with over 40 years experience and respect looking at how trauma has been affecting us from childhood long into our adult years. Today he’s discussing The Myth of Normal, also the title of his latest book on trauma, illness, and healing in a toxic culture. From the very beginning Gabor exposes the myth and explains why this new norm we’ve accepted is actually making us sick.
Between exposing how trauma in our childhood and suppressed anger lead to autoimmune diseases and how our adaptive responses to bad parenting decisions cause a plethora of problems in our adult lives, Gabor Mate is laying down food for thought that will shift the way you see everything.
Check out Gabor Mate’s latest book, The Myth of Normal, Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture: https://amzn.to/3RQl0rg
SHOW NOTES:
0:00 | Introduction to Gabor Mate
0:39 | What Is the Myth of Normal
6:20 | Authenticity & Attachment
10:37 | Boundaries For Unconditional Love
19:45 | Nature’s Agenda for Humans
30:50 | Best Human Conditions to Thrive
36:36 | Stop Suppressing Healthy Anger
47:39 | Depression & Disconnection
53:32 | Emotional Regulation to Trauma
59:46 | Breaking Traumatic Cycles
1:12:35 | Healing Childhood Adaptations
1:23:50 | Conditions of Unconditional Love
1:27:14 | Changing an Unhealthy Culture
QUOTES:
“In this culture the norm is neither healthy nor is it natural, in fact the norm I think is making us sick.” [0:56]
“Illness in this society given the conditions is a normal response to an abnormal circumstance.” [1:11]
“That means we have to be in touch with our gut feelings and our emotions and to be true to them, and so what we need is relationships is which we can be true to ourselves, that’s a directive.” [4:25]
“When you suppress your emotions you’re suppressing your immune system as well.” [5:55]
“Infant is an expectation for unconditional acceptance. […] We evolved as expectations for certain conditions. The less a society meets those conditions the more toxic it becomes…” [7:56]
“You can set boundaries through just love, through relationship, through example, it doesn’t have to involve force and it certainly doesn’t have to involve physical force.” [13:26]
“You may know on some level that your parents love you because they feed you, they hug you, but at the same time these people that love you are deeply hurting you, that’s traumatic.” [18:38]
“Wealth is defined as a set of social connections rather than a set of physical possessions.” [27:55]
“In this society, it’s the worst of us that get nourished and the best of us that gets suppressed.” [30:56]
“Not feeling your anger was an adaptation to your childhood where the anger wasn’t permitted. That emotional physiological effort to repress anger takes a toll on the nervous system and the immune system. It’s a major role in disease ” [42:10]
“Healthy anger is a boundary defense.” [44:15]
“When you suppress the emotions, you’re also suppressing the immune system.” [45:42]
“Trauma is an imprint that makes you react to the present like you’re still a child, […] it’s automatic, it’s unwilled…” [55:39]
“What stresses people are a loss of control, uncertainty, conflict and lack of information.” [1:05:15]
“Having love for a person doesn’t mean that you’re going to put up with everything that they do, […] we have to draw our boundaries, but the question is how do we draw our boundaries and in what spirit and with what intention?” [1:24:41]
“Why should we settle for the worst versions of ourselves…” [1:33:13]
Follow Gabor Mate:
Website: https://drgabormate.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsRF06lSFA8zV9L8_x9jzIA
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gabormatemd/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/drgabormate
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drgabormate
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