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Summary of Transcript:
Relationship expert Matthew Hussey points out that one of the biggest challenges in relationships is lack of growth. When couples feel like they have fully figured each other out, the sense of mystery disappears, and the chase that was once exciting subsides. Hussey believes that growth, in any form, whether it’s reading a new book or learning a new skill, is key to keeping the relationship alive. Additionally, it’s important to show respect for the relationship by putting in the effort to continue to connect with each other and not take the partner for granted. CEOs like Tom Bilyeu, who present their most charismatic selves to colleagues, can tend to drop their guard around their partner, which could be problematic. The key to sustaining a relationship, according to Hussey, is finding a balance between giving and receiving energy and knowing when to keep certain conversations at work and away from the home front.
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Summary of Description:
Relationship guru Matthew Hussey joins Tom Bilyeu on his show to discuss long-term relationships. He shares three things that everyone must know and account for to have a successful long-term relationship with the right partner. The discussion covers topics such as teamwork, humility, hard work, allowing space for insecurities, breaking emotional patterns, and having difficult conversations. The conversation ends with a discussion of the regrets that come with choosing to have a long-term relationship or not.
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Ironclad Discipline: 3 Things You Must Know for a Lasting Relationship
Matthew Hussey, a renowned relationship guru, has dedicated his career to guiding women to rediscover their power in relationships to start dating from a place of empowerment, confidence, and security. In a recent episode, he discussed with Tom, who has been in a happy marriage for over 20 years, the three critical things to build a healthy, lasting relationship with the right partner.
1. Respect your Relationship and put in Effort
Many people judge the success of a relationship based on the passion they feel now and their ability to suppress their doubts and insecurities for the moment. Hussey advises us to respect our relationship and partner enough to keep putting effort into it continuously. A relationship is always a work in progress, and growth is one of the greatest challenges that you can present.
2. Teamwork is Key to Happiness
Happiness lies in making your partner happy. So instead of giving what you like to give, give your partner what they truly need and crave. Work on being a team and making each other happy as much as possible. In a right relationship, hard conversations make you a stronger unit, and you come out better and happier.
3. Allow Space for Insecurities
Insecurity plays a significant role in triggering difficult conversations and fights. It is essential to understand that both individuals in a relationship have different insecurities, and giving each other space and a voice in those moments is crucial to preventing those insecurities from becoming permanent issues.
Additional Insights
Hussey and Tom covered many other topics such as making each other happy, the regret of having kids or relationships, dating differences for men and women, and how to stop arguing over B.S. A few quotes stuck out that provided additional insights into lasting and healthy relationships.
“Our life gets better in direct proportion to the number of difficult conversations we’re willing to have.” In other words, the hard conversations are essential to bringing growth and success to a relationship.
“If you’re on the receiving end of the wrong behavior, bringing your best to that moment is the greatest form of closure if the relationship ends.” This point highlights the importance of how we react or approach harsh situations and how our actions and words might influence the outcome of the event.
Conclusion
In summary, building a lasting and healthy relationship requires mutual respect, teamwork, and understanding each other’s insecurities. It’s essential to realize that a relationship requires continuous effort and work towards growth, as growth is one of the greatest challenges we can present. As Hussey said, “dating to have a long-term relationship means being intentional and doing things differently.” Therefore, being aware of these three things and making the effort to put them into practice will provide you with a better chance to have a more robust, healthier, and long-term relationship.
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On Today’s Episode:
Dating to have a long-term relationship means being intentional and doing things a little differently. Judging the success of your existing relationship on the passion you feel now and your ability to suppress your doubts and insecurities for the moment are not great long-term strategies for a successful relationship.
Let’s get straight to the point and help you figure out what you’ll need to start doing to have a healthier, happier, and longer lasting relationship with the right partner.
If you ever searched for relationship advice on YouTube chances are you’ve seen Matthew Hussey, the relationship guru appear in the search results. His YouTube channel and career has been dedicated to helping women Get the Guy by showing women how to rediscover their power so they can start dating from a place of empowerment, confidence, and security. His dating advice and approach to coaching people in relationships is real, raw, and honest.
Today he’s talking with Tom and sharing 3 things everyone must know and account for if being with your partner for the long-haul is a goal. Between Matthews 15 plus years experience coaching women and Tom’s 20 plus years of being successfully married, they are dropping gems you can’t afford to miss.
SHOW NOTES:
0:00 | Introduction to Matthew Hussey
0:47 | 3 Ways to Fix Your Relationship (1:48)
15:33 | Secret to Making Each Other Happy
28:47 | The Right Relationship Is Hard Work
37:47 | Allow Space for Insecurities
46:57 | Break Your Emotional Patterns
53:14 | Do This To Stop Arguing Over B.S.
1:13:51 | Dating Differences for Men and Women
1:30:37 | Regret of Having Kids or Relationships?
QUOTES:
“Continuing to grow is one of the greatest challenges you can present.” [2:22]
“Respect your relationship and your partner enough to try, […] to actually put in the effort with them that you put in with new people” [4:21]
“We have to be willing to give someone what they crave and need, not the thing that we really like giving.” [11:01]
“One of the greatest values that keeps a relationship going is teamwork, […] We are a team in making each other as happy as possible. [21:03]
“To ignore the regrets or to simply pass them off is to not take the lesson with you.” [29:50]
“Our life gets better in direct proportion to the number of difficult conversations we’re willing to have.” [30:45]
“If it’s the right relationship the difference is you come out of that [hard] conversation stronger as a unit, that to me defines the right relationship [32:43]
“If you’re on the receiving end of the wrong behavior, […] I think that bringing your best to that moment is the greatest form of closure if the relationship ends.” [38:09]
“If you’re in a fight, someone has triggered your insecurities.” Tom Bilyeu [58:00]
“All of us guys who go out into our lives with this kind of alpha energy, putting on a front and being a certain thing with all of our friends are so stripped bare by those arguments.” [59:22]
“With the person you’re with, understand that it is as hard for them to shake that thing that you don’t like that they do, as it is for you to shake that thing in you that you’ve spent your whole life trying to stop doing [1:09:42]
“You have to have a really difficult conversation with yourself and say, ‘how essential is this to my being?’ […] you have to have a plan B that becomes your plan A.” [1:23:38]
“..date to date, fall in love to fall in love, so that they can experience a relationship organically instead of going with this enormous insecurity from the very beginning.” [1:27:20]
“There will be a regret either way, but which is the more powerful? It forces really honest questions, and they are questions that most of us want to hide until the last possible minute.” [1:32:57]
Follow Matthew Hussey:
Website: https://www.howtogettheguy.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/gettheguyteam
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thematthewhussey/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CoachMatthewHussey/
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