Summary of Everyone Is Mostly the Same… (And Why This Is Good News):
The author reflects on their experience of writing a blog and receiving questions and stories from thousands of different people from around the world. Despite the vast differences in culture and circumstance, the author learned that each person struggles with a few universal stressors and anxieties, such as relationships, purpose, emotions, resilience, life planning, and habits. The author believes that expressing vulnerability and sharing these struggles can be healing for both the individual and those around them. Furthermore, the author’s online courses are structured around these universal struggles to help others navigate through them.
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The Universal Struggles of the Human Condition
As a writer and online personality with a global reach, Mark Manson has received messages from around 50,000 people of different races, genders, cultures, and ages over the past 15 years. Through his blog and courses, he has learned that while contexts and life stories vary, many people are dealing with the same small set of stressors and anxieties. In this article, we delve into the lessons Manson has learned from these messages, and how they can help us empathize better, understand that we’re not alone, and live more fulfilling lives.
The Power of Broad Exposure
When Manson started his career, he was grateful and amazed that so many people were reading his thoughts. However, he soon realized that the most special thing about his situation was the unique ability to be exposed to many other people’s thoughts and experiences. While the contexts varied and cultures were different, many people struggled with the same set of problems. This insane breadth of exposure enabled him to understand the universal aspects of the human condition, something that has greatly influenced his work.
The Universal Struggles
From overworked women in India to insecure teenagers in Quebec, from grandparents struggling with anxiety in Texas to desperate immigrants in Australia, many people feel like they’re weird for having the same problems. However, they’re not alone. At our core, we all have the same struggles and anxieties. These include being unhappy in our relationships, being unsure of the future, struggling with anxiety, anger or depression, and feeling insecure about our money, status, or appearance.
The Illusion of Uniqueness
Many of the people who write to Manson believe that their problems are unique or special. However, when Manson receives emails from others with the same problem, he realizes that there are commonalities that we all share. Being a teenager in Quebec does not make someone different from every other teenager in the world. At their core, most of the problems people face are normal struggles and anxieties of the human condition.
The Importance of Vulnerability
It’s important to be vulnerable and express pain and shame, not just to heal ourselves but to give others who have remained silent permission to express theirs. When we express our struggles and anxieties, we’re able to find support from people who can relate to our experiences. However, not everyone is comfortable with being vulnerable. For those who are not, Manson encourages them to talk to someone in their life about their problems. This can be healing not just for the individual but for those around them.
The Takeaway
Mark Manson’s exposure to so many people from different walks of life has allowed him to understand the universal aspects of the human condition. While our values, cultures, and life circumstances change, our core struggles as humans remain the same. We need to understand that our problems are not unique or special, and that we’re not alone in our struggles. By being vulnerable and expressing our pain and shame, we can connect with others and find support. Ultimately, understanding our universal struggles can help us live more fulfilling lives.
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