Summary of I Gave a High-School Commencement Address: Five Essential Paradoxes:
The author was asked to give the commencement address for their daughter’s high school graduation. They wrote two versions of the address, one profound and one practical. The given version explores five essential paradoxes that can help make sense of experiences. The first paradox is about being selfish and selfless for both selfless and selfish reasons. The second paradox is about being unique but also ordinary. The third paradox is that not choosing is a choice. The fourth paradox is about accepting oneself and continuously striving for self-improvement. The fifth and final paradox is about finding balance between planning for the future and appreciating the present.
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avoiding taking responsibility for our own lives. We’re letting external factors and other people dictate our choices and direction. We’re not actively engaging in the decision-making process.
Not choosing is a choice in itself. It’s a choice to remain stagnant, to continue along a path that may not align with our values and desires. It’s a choice to relinquish control over our own lives and settle for what comes our way.
But choosing is hard. It requires introspection, self-awareness, and a willingness to take risks. It means facing the fear of making the wrong decision and accepting the consequences of our choices. However, it is through making choices that we truly discover who we are and what we want.
So, graduates, as you navigate this new stage of life, remember that not choosing is a choice. Don’t be afraid to take responsibility for your own path and actively make decisions that align with your values and aspirations. Embrace the discomfort and uncertainty that comes with choosing, for it is through choosing that you will find fulfillment and create a life that is truly your own.
Paradox #4: Embrace failure to succeed.Failure is often seen as something to be avoided at all costs. We are conditioned to fear failure and the negative emotions that come with it. But the truth is, failure is an inevitable part of life, and it is through failure that we learn, grow, and ultimately succeed.
Failure is not the opposite of success; it is a stepping stone towards success. It is the detours, setbacks, and obstacles that push us to reevaluate our strategies, learn from our mistakes, and develop resilience. As the saying goes, “Fall seven times, stand up eight.”
Henry Ford once said, “Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.” When we embrace failure as a natural part of the journey, we free ourselves from the paralyzing fear of making mistakes and allow ourselves to take risks and pursue our goals boldly.
So, graduates, don’t be afraid to fail. Embrace failure as a valuable teacher and catalyst for growth. Learn from your failures, adapt your approach, and keep moving forward. The road to success is paved with failures, and every failure brings you one step closer to achieving your dreams.
Paradox #5: Appreciate the journey and strive for the destination.In our goal-oriented society, we often focus solely on the end result. We fixate on achieving the next milestone, reaching the pinnacle of success, or obtaining a specific outcome. We believe that once we reach our destination, we will find happiness and fulfillment.
But life is not just about the destination; it is about the journey. It is about the experiences, lessons, and growth that occur along the way. It is about the moments of joy, the challenges that test our resilience, and the relationships that shape us.
When we are too focused on the destination, we miss out on the beauty and richness of the journey. We become so fixated on the future that we neglect to appreciate the present moment and the present opportunities.
So, graduates, as you embark on this new chapter of your lives, remember to appreciate the journey. Embrace the ups and downs, the twists and turns, and the unexpected detours. Cherish each moment and find joy in the process of becoming the person you are meant to be.
In conclusion, life is full of paradoxes, and these paradoxes hold valuable lessons for our personal growth and well-being. Embracing these paradoxes can help us navigate the complexities of life and find fulfillment along the way.
So, graduates, as you go forth unafraid, remember the paradoxes: be selfish, if only for selfless reasons, and be selfless, if only for selfish reasons. Understand that you are unique, exactly like everyone else. Recognize that not choosing is a choice and embrace failure as a stepping stone towards success. Finally, appreciate the journey while striving for the destination.
Congratulations once again to the class of 2023. You have accomplished a great milestone, and the future holds endless possibilities. Embrace the paradoxes of life, and may you find happiness, success, and fulfillment in all your endeavors.
